Luggage

Once
again I have discovered another link between ordinary
household items and the mysteries and marvels of the
universe. After having read a current article concerning
Einstein’s theories, I stand in awe of myself for being able
to make these comparisons of such unrelated, yet highly
technical and scientific phenomenon.



Without bothering you with a lot of detailed scientific data
and jargon that many of you might not understand, let me
just start off by telling you that Albert Einstein developed
a lot of ‘theories’ concerning time and space. These are
rather complex and much too complicated for me to explain to
you in the brief time I have here today. Parts of these I
have to admit are difficult for me to fully comprehend, but
let’s move on.



Back in 1912, Einstein thought ‘the cosmological constant
was a way to steady the universe. But if its repulsive
effect, now called dark energy is big enough, it could also
drive the acceleration.’ There you have it. Just as plain as
it can be, isn’t it? I could have diagnosed this matter well
before now, except I had gotten cosmological constant
confused with cosmetologists and consonants. I was
researching Avon ladies learning foreign languages until a
friend pointed out the error of my thinking.



Anyway, now that we’ve settled that and are back on track, I
delved into Einstein’s theories a little more and found that
as a result of the statement he made above, he was able to
conclude that there were such things as black holes in the
universe. I’m confused as to how he made this connection and
will let you know when I find it. It may take a while. I’m
still working on the Avon ladies taking French lessons
concept. In the article, a black hole was described as being
so dense; all of the automobiles in the world would be
compressed into a mass the size of a thimble. Wow, just
think how much that sucker would weigh. You’d need at least
a couple of forklifts to move that thing around.




So,
how do we make the transition from black holes to something
ordinary in our everyday world? Let me show you. On
television, you often see a commercial for a travel bag made
out of plastic that you can stuff clothes in and then hook
it up to a vacuum to suck all of the air out. This allows
the stuff you’re taking to be more compact (dense, as we in
the scientific world call it) and take up less space. Thus,
you are able to squeeze more things into your suitcase for
your trip. Are you with me on this?



This, dear friends, is an example of the big bang or as they
now call it, the big rip. Here you are with your allotted
four suitcases, preparing to go on a well earned vacation
and looking forward to a stress free, relaxing time with
zero worries in the world. You purchase the aforesaid
plastic containers and using your handy vacuum, you suck all
of the air out of your clothing. Now you head to the
airport. You notice that for some reason the baggage seems
to be a bit heavier than your last rip, but you rack it up
to the fact that you’ve given up on working out. You make a
mental note to start doing so once you return. Your bags are
now an example of Einstein’s black hole.



You arrive at your destination and are required to tip the
bellhop an extra five bucks since he has to employ his
cousin to assist him in carrying your baggage to your room.
He tried putting it on one of those carts, but the wheels
fell off. Still you press onward, not suspecting your world
is about to drastically change.



Once you enter your room, you open up your luggage and start
to stow your belongings into the dressers and closet. Once
you unzip the bags, the genie escapes and therein is created
the correlation between your baggage and the big bang
Einstein was referring to. All of the sudden your room has
somehow shrunken to one twin bed and your clothing, nothing
else. This is the very basic building block of our entire
universe. The explosion of a dense (your luggage) matter
into galaxies and solar systems (your room).



Please take this example to heart. Do not compress your
luggage in this manner without thinking one important
thought….that thought is just this…”When I get there, will
they have a vacuum?”



Otherwise you might have to buy five or six more bags just
to take home what you brought with you. I would suspect this
is the real reason for the constant expansion of the
universe. I’ll follow up on this concept as soon as I figure
out what the Avon ladies are doing.