It’s
obvious to me that the managers and powers to be for major
league baseball teams are not women. Let me clear that
statement and say that if they are women, they certainly
cannot be mothers.
Here we are in the time of the year where we sit in front of
our televisions and watch as the final two teams duke it out
over the next week or so to determine who will be the next
winners. Our dogs are upset over the lateness of our hours
since we are going to bed later and later as the innings get
extended. But there I go again, getting off the subject,
which is mothers and baseball teams.
Look
around the dugouts as the games get televised. Do you think
any respectable mother would allow her sons to play in that
filth? Why, my wife has conniption fits each time they pan
around the dugouts. There are paper cups scattered all over
the place, pieces of paper on the floor and stuck in every
nook and cranny. God knows how much gum someone has to
scrape up every few days. The place is a mess. Chairs are in
disarray, towels thrown all over the place. Germs must be
everywhere. No one seems to give a hoot about cleanliness or
sanitary conditions.
And they spit. Lord, help us …do they spit.
They chew sticks, gum, tobacco, paper, and perhaps nails for
all we know. Every mouth on both teams is in constant motion
from the start of the game to the final out. It’s amazing to
think they would have the energy to even talk and give
interviews after chewing so hard for so long. You wonder
what happened to their manners, they sneeze, cough and
wheeze in every direction with total abandon and disregard
for the health of their fellow players. Looks to me that if
one guy gets the flu, then the rest aren’t far behind.
Your mother and my mother would have a stroke if they were
allowed to sit in there for thirty minutes or so. That’s why
they aren’t allowed in there.
I’ve had women ask me why they call it a ‘dug out’ or a
‘bull pen’. I have to say I don’t have a clue, but it’s
apparent there aren’t any curtains or decorator cushions
evident from my viewpoint. The terminology fits the
conditions. Maybe pigpen would be more descriptive. We need
to bring this to the attention of the major league owners.
Makes you wonder what the locker rooms look like. We won’t
know since the cameras are seldom allowed back there. I
can’t imagine it being much better, can you?
So do you think its part of the scouting report to evaluate
just how far a potential player can spit? Maybe they go to
his house and look at his room to see if he’s really messy.
Most likely if he was neat and tidy, then he would probably
get a couple of marks off and might not make the team as
well as some slob who throws all of his clothes on the floor
for his mother to pick up.
On the other hand, looking at the kind of bucks these guys
knock down I suppose it’s ok for them to do just about
anything they want to do.
If I was making a gazillion bucks for playing a game, I
suppose I could act childish as well.
And not feel bad about it at all. I could even learn to
spit.