Letters from North
America
Nearly
every day we are
besieged with
advertisements for low
air fares to all parts
of the world. We get it
in the newspapers, on
the television, internet
and even our cell
phones. All of these
costly produced
commercials exclaim to
us that we can fly coast
to coast for as little
as $49.95 or $69.50 or
some such ridiculous
price. What they fail to
tell you is the little
extra fees that you will
have to pay to achieve
these prices.
My wife and I just got
back from a trip to the
west coast. I signed up
for a low fare and that
was all there had been
to it, I wouldn’t be
writing this today. This
airline doesn’t charge
for a piece of checked
baggage, I’ll get to
this later. While their
fare prices were a
bargain, I noticed that
the government tacked on
nearly $30 for fees,
security and other
costs. I suppose someone
has to pay for all of
those security guys at
each airport. Before
long they will charge a
‘terminal entrance’ cost
just to walk in the
door. Look for it.
As far as I’m concerned
they should charge for
big bags that don’t fit
in the overhead bins.
I’m always afraid some
of the passengers are
going to punch a hole in
the side of the plane
just trying to get that
little sucker in the bin
and then close the door.
My attitude is that if
they can’t lift the bag
by themselves, they
shouldn’t try to put it
over the top of my head.
This morning a couple of
airlines announced a new
program to charge each
passenger $8.00 for a
pillow and a blanket.
One of their spokesmen
stated that they felt it
was a good deal since
each passenger would be
able to take this
‘souvenir’ home with
them. I’ve never
considered an airline
blanket and pillow to be
anywhere close to a
‘souvenir’ for any trip
I’ve ever made in my
life, but I suppose they
had to spin their story
one way or another. I’m
certain it won’t be long
before there are airline
‘souvenir’ collector
groups showing up and
‘blanket and pillow’
conventions around the
country. If they make
it, you can bet someone
will save it.
Having a devious mind, I
can only think that it
will just be a matter of
time until we start to
see other charges
imposed on us by the
airlines in addition to
the airfare and costs to
check a piece of
baggage. We know they
charge for some drinks
and certainly any
alcoholic beverages.
Soon, if you want a cold
drink or ice in your
cup…well, that’ll cost a
little more. Some
airlines still give away
peanuts, but others are
talking about charging
for any type of snacks.
Certainly not a big
money maker here since
the food is worse than
anything you can get at
a hospital. Maybe that’s
where they get it from
the stuff that they
can’t sell at hospitals.
How long before we can
expect to be charged for
a seat belt or a
‘reclining chair’ fee?
It already costs more
(premium) for seats for
bulkhead as well as exit
rows where you have more
legroom. I heard one
airline was trying to
sell ‘standing room’
tickets, but I suppose
that thought never got
off the ground. (Pun
intended)
You want music? You’ll
need a set of earphones,
those will cost extra.
You want to watch
television, be prepared
to pay up front or sit
quietly in your seat for
the entire flight. How
long will it be before
they charge for water if
you want some? Airline
magazine? They’ll
continue to give those
away since no one reads
them anyway. Got trash?
They can get you for a
‘recycling’ fee, the
same as the tire stores
do when you buy some new
tires for your car.
Now you know if these
guys were really smart,
they would stop all of
these trivial charges
and use my idea. I’d
give away all the beer,
peanuts and pretzels
that a passenger could
drink. Then I’d have pay
toilets. I mean where
else can you go? It
isn’t like you have any
options.
Ka-ching—-those
airline stewardesses or
stewards or whatever you
call them would have to
have coin changers on
their belts. Don’t worry
if you don’t have
cash…I’m sure they’ll
take Visa.
Comments got to
www.pearyperry.com.
Complaints go nowhere.
