It appears to me that the current raves for nighttime television are the so-called ‘reality’ shows. The latest one is a remake of the old ‘Gilligans Island” routine. I don’t know about you, but there were a few things I found hard to believe with that series. Like, everything from the beginning to the end. I always wondered why they didn’t use the stuff that ‘washed’ up on the beach to just make themselves a boat and get off the island.

However, that probably didn’t fit the story line and would have made too much sense, which doesn’t seem to happen on television. I always wondered where they got those clothes….

But, in today’s world we have programs where the contestants eat weird things, like roaches or worms. Now, no one really likes to eat roaches, worms or other disgusting insects, but it seems to keep the show going on week after week.

I don’t consider this to be reality. Real people don’t normally eat worms and roaches. We eat bad hamburgers and spoiled seafood. If the producers wanted to have a ‘real’ show then I’d suggest this. Pick some small, Midwest town in America…. go to the county health department and ask them to give you a list of the worst cafes in the county. Then send your contestants over to this dismal diner and let them order anything they want off the menu. This, my friends is reality. Not some worm eating contest. This is what we have to endure on a daily basis. You won’t see worms on the menu, but you might just have a few if you look real hard…. see how many contestants want to go though with this kind of a deal.

How about these “survivor’ type programs’ We’re to believe that this group of strangers just happen to be set down in some jungle, island, swamp or you name it and have to live off the land by their wits alone. Is this goofy or what’

First off, how much danger can they be in when there’s a film crew hovering over the entire bunch of them recording every action they make, twenty four hours a day’do you really think any of these people are in any kind of ‘real’ danger’ If they get a cut, scratch or heaven forbid, snakebite, you can bet the show has a team of doctors and nurses standing by to provide Johnnie on the spot medical treatment in minutes. In my world, reality is going to the doctor and sitting on your butt for hours at a time waiting for him to return from some emergency surgery. Here you are in some cramped waiting room with a minor problem and you’re subjected to some joker sitting next to you with a cough that would wake the dead. The person sneezing on you looks like they have typhoid or Ebola or something worse. You’d like to move, but all the chairs are taken. This is reality. An hour after you leave, your nose starts to run and your head hurts. Think the contestants on survivor ever go through anything like this’ Not in our lifetimes. Do you really think these folks would ever go hungry’don’t you think there is a catering service providing food for all of the camera crew and production people’ How many times do you think one of the contestants just got in the line and grabbed a heaping plate from the buffet’

“No, you can’t have any turkey and dressing …you have to eat slugs and leaves…” Sure thing.

No, if the networks really wanted to show ‘reality’ then they could make contestants do something grueling such as ironing. Or having men wash clothes by hand, or better yet wash clothes in a machine and forget to tell them about sorting whites from the colors. Bed making, there’s something that is real, how many people can make a bed in say 2 minutes flat because your in-laws are on the front porch’

How about giving a bunch of clueless contestants some kids for a week and see what happens’ That’s reality enough for anyone. You‘d have to make certain they had never had any kids before to qualify them, but this might be the ultimate reality program we’ve all been waiting for.

Imagine some twenty something yuppie who lives by themselves in New York City having to raise a couple of kids, say 7 and 12 years old for a couple of weeks. You know, fix lunches, and make them do their homework, take baths, clean their room and help with the dishes. Then throw in some PTO, soccer, football, ballet, judo, art and gymnastic lessons just for drill. Talk about real life, this is it…

My guess is, it’d never fly…entirely too unbelievable.

Have a good week….