Aaahaa,
Baja, somewhere in Mexico. Whenever I sign up to take a trip to
some remote place, you can take it to the bank that it will be
remote. We got in here yesterday and will be here for another
seven days. It was pictured in the sales brochure as being an
‘isolated fishing lodge on the Baja peninsula where you can relax
and not worry about the outside world.’ Worry about the outside
world?
This place is so remote they have to import air. No television, no
telephone, no fax, no e-mail. We can’t even get short-wave radio
signals. This is a part of the world where they sing songs about
cockroaches. We could be in a nuclear war and you wouldn’t have a
clue in this spot. I can’t even tell you where we arrived when we
flew in. The tickets said San Jose Baja. I thought we were going
to Cabo San Lucas, but all of the traffic signs said San Lucas,
Baja. I have no idea where we are, but I know it ain’t Kansas.
The traffic signs are very descriptive, they either say peligro
(danger) or they have a skull and cross bones on them, which tend
to make you think there are pirates around somewhere or else you
better slow down on the curves in the road. The shrines erected
about every ½ mile alongside the highway should tell you something
about the way people drive around here. The driver of our van
apparently is blind since he ignores all of the danger signals and
is determined to get us to the lodge in an attempt to break some
kind of land speed record. The road leading to the lodge has a
novel method of slowing the traffic through the villages as we
make our way into the night. They simply don’t pave the roads,
making it a necessity for you to slow to about ½ of a mile per
hour otherwise your vehicle will fall completely apart in a matter
of minutes. In fact I think I heard four or five pieces drop off
as we passed through the last town, or village. I’m certain most
of the parts to the air-conditioning have already fallen off long
ago, a fact the driver chooses to ignore since we are barreling
along with all of the windows rolled up and a very pathetic breeze
wheezing from the vents.
Personally I think he is completely aware of the misery we are all
enduring but he is still holding a grudge from the Mexican war we
had with these folks some years ago. At least the British got over
their anger for the most part. I try to tell him I am his friend,
but each time I do this he thinks I need to stop and go to the
bathroom. At this rate it may be days before we arrive at the
resort. It’s hard to tell if these people are talking about you
since I can’t understand their language. I suspect they are most
of the time. Once we arrive at the lodge I begin to settle down.
It appears to be ok since they have clean rooms, hot water and
plenty of towels, all of which are needed for civilized
vacationing. I am not, nor do I want to be a rough it type of
person. I did my share of that while working for the US Army. I
don’t think it makes good sense to pay hard earned bucks to go
someplace to be miserable. There isn’t any danger of us running
off to someplace and getting lost since there doesn’t seem to be
anyplace within 100 miles to run off to.
People who build prisons should check this place out. No late
nights or wild carousing for us as the bar closes at 10pm along
with the restaurant. We know we won’t starve from the amounts of
food that is being shoveled onto the tables. However, the only
thing green we see is the flower arrangement. Can you get scurvy
in a week? Our grease quota will be filled for about 5 years into
the future. I am writing this after the first fishing trip which
was wonderful. Great crew, good boat and lots of fun…every one of
us caught fish… Perfect weather, cool for this time of the year.
Dead calm water. Fish all morning and part of the afternoon then
back to take a shower and nap. Almost time to go get a beer and
eat dinner then watch the stars come out. We’re told this is our
schedule for the remainder of the week. Come to think of it, this
isn’t so bad after all. If you don’t get this article it’s because
I’ve decided to stay here…..who needs television and all of that
other stuff anyway? This is what vacations are meant to be. Adios
amigos. La Cucaracha…La Cucaracha….
