I
think the prevailing thought of the day some time ago was that all
of the new labor saving devices that were being invented through the
use of the computer would allow us to have less work and more free
time. It seems to me that I’m working harder just to keep up with
where I was years ago. It also seems to me that some of the everyday
processes that we used think were so simple have now gotten more
complicated rather than easier.
If
you’ve read this column for any length of time you know that I get
wound up about voice mail from time to time. I think it was
originally intended to help us, but I swear it looks like the very
devil to me on any given day. For example, say you want to call in
to your bank and check out your checking account balance. In the old
days, you’d call in, ask for customer service, get some pleasant
person on the phone and she’d help you out. She might ask what the
amount of your last deposit was and if you knew that, then she’d
tell you what you had in the bank. Maybe even talk about the weather
or other things. Try this today.
First
off, you get this mechanical voice that tells you the
following…"All of our customer representatives are busy
assisting other customers, your call is important to us, so please
stay on the line and the first available operator will help you in
approximately 23 hours." Then you get 1. Music that is too
loud. 2. Music that is dumb. 3. Music that you can’ t stand. 4. All
of the above. What’s worse is you get a cheery commercial telling
you to "hold on, someone will be with you shortly." After
this they launch into a discussion of loan rates for things you
don’t want or need. Finally you get a series of clicks and you think
that you may be headed to home plate. Wrong.
The
next voice asks you to please key in your 29-digit account number.
Then they remind you that if you make a mistake, you will be
disconnected and you will have to start all over again. This places
a large amount of stress on you causing you to yell at anyone while
you’re in the process of doing something akin to initiating the
launch codes for the nuclear warheads of the entire United States.
Once you have successfully completed this task, you’d think you
might make it to the human stage. Wrong again. Now they ask for your
mother’s maiden name. This is a piece of cake. You do this and
bingo, what happens? Now they ask something like.” Give us the name
of your 4th grade teacher." Your palms sweat and you try and
remember if it was Miss. Sweatly or Mrs. Rasputin. You opt for Mrs.
Rasputin, but the buzzer sounds and you get dumped back into square
one to try again. After several more attempts to defeat the
electronic monster you finally give up and deposit some more money
into your account just to be sure. This of course is exactly what
the baking institutions wanted you to do in the first place.
I
am firmly convinced that the number of people using banks in this
country is at all time high. I am also convinced that the number of
people, actual human beings, is at an all time low. I always
envision the phone rooms of Mega-Bank Corp. as looking like the real
Wizard of Oz. There is probably 1 very tired, little old man,
sitting back there answering the one call a day that might just make
it past the electronic maze the banks have built to keep from having
to hire folks to answer questions about our money. Yes, I think it’s
safe to say that the personal touch is rapidly disappearing in many
ways in our world. Who knows what we can expect in 100 years or so
from now? Trust me, I won’t be here to see it. I don’t know that I’d
want to anyway. Maybe that’s how the folks that lived around the
turn of the century (1800 going into 1900) felt when telephones were
introduced. Takes away the personal touch. Maybe they were right.
Anyway, can a machine ever replace columns like this? Time will
tell. Have a good week. Comments? www.pearyperry.compperry@austin.rr.com
