Semi Retired

So as I
sit here watching the gas prices go up and up and my money
go down and down, it leads me to wonder if the government
has a clue about what is going on?



Take for example, the chairman of the Federal Reserve, not
an elected position, an appointed one. Yet, this man is so
powerful, when his eyebrows go certain directions the stock
markets react as if Moses spoke from the mountain. People
chase after him wanting to know what he ate for breakfast in
hopes it will tell them what kind of a mood he might be in
this morning. Granola and prunes…might be bad….bacon and
eggs…might be good.



Now, I’m sure Mr. Greenspan is probably a very nice person,
but do we really want to know if he’s regular or not? Do his
personal habits influence us this much in our daily lives?
Apparently they do.



If he buys a new car does that signal a return to
prosperity? What happens, pray tell, if he decides to sell a
car? I haven’t tracked anything along this line, but I
wouldn’t be surprised to see the market take a drop based on
his getting rid of his 1993 Oldsmobile or whatever.



Last week, Mr. Greenspan was discussing the possibility of
changing the rules when it comes to social security. I don’t
know about you, but it seems very suspicious to me that
about the time I start to get close to the year I can start
to draw out of the plan, they move the age up another couple
of years. If I recall, it seems to me that you used to be
able to start collecting social security about age 60. Now
it seems, its 62, almost 63 and then you can wait until 65
or so to collect more and then if you’re really feeling
lucky, big boy, you can wait until you’re 70 and get the
whole shebang.



Seems to me that they are watching me and me alone to come
up with the policy changes. About the time I get to the
magic point where I might want to consider slowing down and
collecting some of those bucks I’ve paid in for nearly fifty
years, they come around and change the rules to the point
where I have no choice but to keep on going. I hardly think
anything I could actually collect is enough to warrant the
attention of the mighty Federal Reserve, but I’m not so
sure.



In fact I’m not so sure about anything anymore. I can’t
collect Medicare since I’m not old enough nor am I in bad
enough health. I make too much money to qualify for any kind
of assistance programs, but not enough to pay all of my
bills each month. I know I should save more, but by the time
I pay my taxes, there doesn’t seem to be that much left
over. It seems as if the only option left to me is to just
keep on plugging away at what I do and keep on doing it
until I either fall over or win the lottery.



I’m not eligible for any governmental grants or programs
that might help me get from here to there. It’s as if I’m
stuck in a sort of semi-retired-must-keep-working-to-live
limbo.



Somewhere I read a sign that said…"The faster I go, the
behinder I get…"



I can identify with that one for sure.



I’d consider taking bankruptcy, but I owe too much for that
to happen. It seems you have to plan on taking bankruptcy,
if you want it to come out right. I guess I haven’t planned
well enough.



I wish they had taught us stuff in school about what to look
forward to when you get old instead of dumb things like…"In
1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue.." Was I absent for
those classes on how to invest? Did they even have any in
the first place?



The trouble with being a middle class American is simply
this, you’re too well off to get any help from the
government and you’re not well enough off to get any help
from the government. We don’t qualify for big tax breaks,
since we don’t make enough to get a break on anything. We
make too much to get paid for not working since we work. I
don’t have any farms to collect subsidies for not planting
crops and if I planted anything it wouldn’t qualify anyway.
I don’t have a trust fund stashed somewhere in the Caribbean
islands since no one trusted me to establish the fund in the
first place.



I’d like to sue someone over all this, but can’t find an
attorney who’ll talk to me without wanting a lot of money I
don’t have.



It’s kind of like the bank charging you an overdraft fee for
a bounced check. You didn’t have enough money in the account
and that’s why the check bounced, so they charge you more
money that you don’t have?



Can you explain this to me Mr. Greenspan?



No, better yet…eat your Wheaties…you’ll need them