I
think I’ve heard it
said that some
things are better
left alone.
Here’s the deal, up
in Kansas at
something called the
Kansas Underground
Salt Museum they’ve
discovered an
organism about 250
million years old.
And that’s not all;
they’ve succeeded in
getting it to
reawaken. As in
bringing it back to
life. You got it;
they have located
some species of
bacteria that has
been locked inside
of a Kansas salt
cavern for those 250
million years.
Better still, they
think they might
have found some
other strains of the
stuff that could be
275 million years
old. They said all
of the bacteria that
has been found is
older than the
dinosaurs.
Let’s think about
this for a moment.
The dinosaurs and a
lot of other species
died off sometime
long ago, right? I
mean we don’t see a
lot of prehistoric
animals or reptiles
running around the
planet except in the
movies. So what
killed them off? Who
knows? There are all
kinds of theories,
such as some giant
asteroid or comet
having hit the earth
and blocking out the
sun for a thousand
years and so on. We
certainly don’t have
any written records
left over from that
time frame to
research and talk
about, do we? I mean
Uglue the European
Neanderthal didn’t
look around one day
and notice that a
lot of the animals
had just disappeared
and then went back
to his cave and
jotted down a few
notes expressing his
concern and thoughts
on this subject.
Nope, Uglue was
probably out chasing
some dinner for the
little woman who
needed some more
skins to cover the
holes in their new
dwelling. She also
needed more meat
since her brothers
and their wives had
just moved in with
them. She also
wanted Uglue to
start bringing in
more firewood each
day since her mother
was coming to live
with them as well
and she needed the
fire going due to
her arthritis. Of
course Uglue didn’t
know to call his
mother in laws
condition
arthritis…. he
just called it …
the old woman’s
condition. Actually
he didn’t even say
this out loud since
his wife or mother
in law had a
tendency to hit him
rather sharply over
the head with a
large femur left
over from a previous
feast.
Our man Uglue spent
his days out in the
forests and woods
trying to stay
alive. He had no
money, no currency
of any kind and no
government, which in
hindsight was a
blessing he wasn’t
even aware of. Their
voting process was
fairly simple; the
guy with the biggest
stick usually was
the leader. Oil and
tar bubbled up
freely from the
ground and Uglue
thought of it as a
nuisance and wished
he had more water.
What good was this
black stuff anyway?
The concept of land
ownership had not
been invented so
Uglue did not have
the ability to stake
out his claim for
future generations.
If he had done so,
his family would
have been much
better off today and
could quit their
jobs in the cheese
factory.
But here we are some
250 million years
later. I probably
don’t have my time
lines correct, but
who cares … I’m
making this up
anyway. And now we
have some people in
Kansas who have
brought some ancient
bacteria back to
life.
My question is, how
do they know this
stuff is safe to
bring back to life?
Maybe this is the
very thing that did
in the dinosaurs.
How would they know?
What would they do
if it escaped and
got into the air and
started killing off
everyone? I’m all
for science, but
I’ve always been
afraid of rockets
from the moon and
Mars bringing back
strange stuff that
could kill us all.
It could happen,
couldn’t it? I
suppose if a large
number of people up
in Kansas start
dying off, then we
should start to be
concerned. I’ll try
to keep tabs on that
in the coming weeks.
Let me know if you
hear anything.
Anyway, I suppose
old Uglue had more
to worry about than
something such as a
virus or bacteria or
even the dinosaurs.
His significant
other just told him
that her father had
decided to come back
home and life with
them.
He heard they had a
nice cave, plenty of
food and a good warm
fire.
Uglue is looking
forward to the day
when beer gets
invented.
